Diary Update:

I am writing this diary entry much later than I had planned. As you may have noticed from my previous post, I have been struggling lately with my depression, which includes keeping my diary and blog updated. Unfortunately, at the moment, I am feeling unwell with flu-like symptoms, and I hope it’s not COVID-19. Despite feeling unwell and having trouble sleeping, I want to update my diary, and now seems like the time to do so.

I have attended my first session of SLT with a Lead Consultant Speech and Language Therapist, Matthew Mills. I was extremely nervous and went in completely blind, with little to no knowledge of voice exercises or the biology of the throat, ranges, notes, pitch, vocal folds, the larynx, and more. As someone who is not a “drama” person and has had a reclusive lifestyle, it was difficult to open up and follow the exercises given. However, I spent the first 30 minutes learning how everything is connected and how the voice works, including vibration, pitch, tones, and was even given a useful app called ‘perfect piano’ where I can enable the letters for each key and gauge my pitch. Matthew Mills was extremally understanding and explained everything in ways i could understand.

During the session, I was given some practice exercises. The first exercise was to play the note E3 on the keyboard, then follow the pattern of 10 x ‘Mmmmm, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.’ We use the sound of ‘M’ as it’s smooth and easy to maintain and measure pitch. Doing this two times a day (minimum) will help me get used to the resonance/vibration of the higher pitch. The other exercise was to hum for around 4-5 seconds the same ‘Mmmmmm..’ and do this 5 to 10 times a day. For session 1, we are aiming for E3, and training the vocal folds to vibrate quicker

Overall, I came away from the first hour session with a greater understanding of how the body creates sound and what we can do to control this sound. I may have been nervous, borderline terrified, but I pushed through and felt all the more confident since. I am still scared for the next meetings coming up, but I will do my best again, as each hurdle I pass, the next gets easier.

Finding my voice has been a significant part of my journey. I have been looking forward to this opportunity for a long time, and I know that it will take time, effort, and patience to achieve my goal. I am grateful for this chance to learn and grow, and I am determined to keep going. This first session has been both challenging and enlightening,

Side Note: I sent a email to GIC to reschedule my appointment comming up (now in two days) however have not had any confirmation, I will find an alternative contact method and get comfirmation.

Until next time,

Personal Goals:

Days without Alcohol: 61D 06h 18m 38s